Sher and I were having our bi-monthly margarita-Tuesdays when our conversation somehow segued into sex. Conversation about sex, I mean. Sher and I were never incredibly close, but over the past few months we’ve grown fond of the other’s company, and quite enjoy our little sessions. It’s like going home for lunch, but having an afternoon delight instead. The only way I can express the pleasure I feel after.
We’re both in very different places in our lives. Sher has been with her boyfriend for almost three years, and they could not be more in love. He’s gone back to his home country to finish his medical residency, so they are trying the whole long-distance thing. I’ve never believed in those kinds of relationships but if anyone could make it work, it would be Sher. I, on the other hand, am single but not available.
I remember when I was in her position – a steady, solid, monogamous relationship. I also remember how despite how adventurous, willing, and driven my partner and I were, the fireworks in the bedroom got less bright and exciting as time went on. It’s not that we were not attracted to each other, because we were. But things just changed, and priorities and what we “get off on” shifted.
Clearly I was the only one at the table who experienced this.
“What does that even mean? How can it fizzle out?”
Silly, naive girl. Clearly her relationship was not as mature as mine. Eventually things change and the relationship grows.
“Don’t get me wrong, that’s great and all but how often did you guys do it?”
What a nosy parker. Was she fishing for tips because she knew what a great relationship I had? So I told her. When we first started going out we were at it like rabbits, and as time progressed we went into double-rabbit mode. But as time kept moving on, the rabbits were released and we were down to maybe twice a week.
“I’m a year short of your relationship, and we do it about eight times a week.”
Hahah. What a liar. I can see right through her.
“I’m not saying it proves anything, but I can’t imagine it any other way. We don’t HAVE to have sex all the time, but we just can’t help ourselves sometimes. I mean yes, sometimes we have to make sure we do but more often than not, it just happens and poof – eight times a week.”
Please. Eight times a week. Clearly her relationship is nowhere near the seriousness and commitment of where my relationship was. Eight times a week? That’s still the puppy love stage. Whatever, Sher.
“Do you think that not doing it as often was part of why you guys broke up?”
WHATEVER, SHER!
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